I think Bun is determined not to be overlooked, even before he or she is born. I have never had a pregnancy that has been so documented. I've been scanned, measured, poked, prodded, and hooked up to more expensive machinery than the Bionic Woman, and one thing has become abundantly clear: obstetrics is, at best, an imprecise science. The more doctors I see, the more opinions I get, and there doesn't seem to be one master opinion that overrides all the others.
At my most recent ultrasound appointment, we discovered, happily, that Bun's single umbilical artery defect has become almost a footnote in my file. The whole reason for being scanned every month was to check on Bun's growth, and to make sure that the compromised cord was delivering enough nutrients to ensure adequate growth.
According to my latest scan, growth restriction doesn't seem to be a problem after all. The doctor is estimating the baby to be close to six pounds already. And I have six weeks left to go.
In addition to a large-ish baby, I also have polyhydramnios. In other words, Bun is enjoying an extra deep swimming pool in there. A normal amniotic fluid level at this stage is 15-25 and I coming in at a nice round 30. And that 30 is making me nice and round.
The perinatologist was convinced that I had gestational diabetes, since that is the number one suspect for both a large baby and too much fluid. I passed my glucose test at 29 weeks, but he told me that sometimes women squeak through on the first test even though they really do have it. Sort of like secret gestational diabetes.
So just like the SAT's, I got a chance to improve my scores by taking the test again. My level the second time around was better than the first test. Again, just like my SATs. My levels mean no secret diabetes for me.
It also means that, since no one can find a cause for the extra fluid, I get to enjoy twice weekly non-stress tests and weekly ultrasounds to measure my fluid level until the baby gets here. My family doctor, the one who will deliver Bun, also has suggested a possible induction before my due date, depending on the outcomes of the non-stress tests and ultrasounds.
I keep flipping between calm and anxious, and I am sure that my exhaustion does nothing to help with the anxiety. I know that whatever will be is what is meant for our family, and I have to struggle against my need to be certain of everything in my life. One minute I am looking forward to going early, just to know that the baby is all right, and the next minute I am stubbornly making up my mind to hold out for the full forty weeks.
I know that whatever happens will be dictated by what is best for the baby, no matter what that means. I just wish that I knew what that course would be. For now, all I can do is to trust in God and be thankful that Bun is healthy so far. Those are no small things.