Sing it, Righteous Brothers, sing it.
I was justthisclose to shutting down the old place this week, but I didn't because I couldn't come up with a good reason other than, "I'm just not feeling the blog anymore."
At first, I blamed Blogger, with it's inconvenient new template and dashboard and it's weird commenting glitches. Some people can't comment at all, even though I have no comment moderation enabled, and some people, who have commented here for years, get shunted to my spam comment folder. I didn't even know I had a spam comment folder. It's annoying.
Then, I figured I was just burnt out with blogging because I've been doing it for a long time. A long, long time. I've just run out of ideas, that's it. But as long as I have kids, I'll always have ideas, am I right?
I thought that maybe my vague feeling of dissatisfaction has to do with my near complete failure to adhere to the healthy eating I had started. Because, really, don't even ask . . . I can't talk about it anymore. The failure is just short of epic.
Maybe it's the 2 year old who has finally just run me into the ground. She is sweet, but holy cow, people. She is constantly undressing herself, including her diaper, which leads to some unpleasant surprises. She is silent as a ninja, she can unlock doors and cabinets, she creeps into my bedroom when Baby is asleep and then climbs into Baby's crib and drops down onto her. She likes to take a running start and leap up onto the kitchen counters (she can climb halfway there already), she can gets her arms out of her car seat straps and partially unbuckle herself. She is tiny, she is strong, she is flexible, and she is inexorable.
In short, there are many days when I am happy to put her in bed for a nap, because the one thing she won't do is climb out of her crib at nap time. I have no idea why, but I ain't looking too hard for the answer if you catch my drift.
I think I'm going through some kind of malaise or maybe it's a springtime torpor, I don't know. Is that even a thing? A Springtime Torpor? Aren't you supposed to be energized and renewed in the spring? All I want to do is sit and read books on my Kindle app. And I was very close to neglecting my children yesterday doing just that.
I looked up "malaise" and "torpor," just to make sure that I had the correct meaning of those words in my head. Malaise: a vague sense of mental or moral ill-being. Torpor: a state of mental or motor inactivity with partial or total insensibility.
I think I found my answer: D) all of the above.
The outside of our house looks like the Beverly Hillbillies, before they moved to Beverly. Our lawn has mostly run to clover and dandelions, so it only looks like grass for about 5 minutes after Rob is done mowing. I just noticed that a recent storm put a hole in our siding, and there are bikes and bats and badminton birdies (just birdies, no rackets, of course) lying all over.
There is also a strange configuration of sticks and stones (the little pagans) and random plastic buckets half filled with water. What is it with kids and buckets of water?
All of the trees are at the point where they desperately need to be pruned by a professional, the problem being that there is no tree professional money in the discretionary budget. Nor is there any "building a lovely screened in porch so we can eat outside without being attacked by wasps" money. Drat.
There are so many things that need to be done -- common, good-housekeeping things that keep the wheels moving around here. I just need to actually do them.
I know the antidote to this torpor is to say a prayer and do just one thing. Just one. I know I'll feel better if I do one thing today, and once I get started I know I'll keep going.
So that means getting off the computer and getting my rear in gear. Happy weekend, my friends, and here's to Just One Thing!
PS: As if I needed anymore confirmation of what I need to do, today is the feast of St. Zita, patron saint of domestic workers and maids. St. Zita who said that "laziness is fake holiness." Zowie! Okay, St. Zita, you've got your work cut out for you. Pray for me!