Friday, March 28, 2008

Foolproof Method?

I have discovered the secret to getting Bun to sleep, and, true to form, Bun has picked the most mobility hampering method possible.

I have to swaddle him and then lay (lie? lay? help me out, ye English majors who are not sleep deprived) on my left side in my own bed (not the couch! never the couch!) with him practically tucked up into my armpit. Then, once he falls asleep, I have to give him about ten minutes to see if he is really asleep or if he is faking me out. This is a crucial step because I have fallen for the fake-out in my haste to get up and do something else. Like go to the bathroom or stop Sally from unwrapping all of the Easter chocolate.

Once I have determined he is asleep, I slowly drag my arm out from beneath him and roll him into the warm spot I've been occupying, because we all know that cold sheets mean your mother is trying to sneak out the back, Jack. If he is still asleep, then I slither down off of the bed shaking the mattress as little as possible and, I will admit it only to you, my friends, I have been known to hit the floor and crawl away from the bed. Because even though he can only see things that are a foot away from his face, Bun can sense my upright presence, you know.

If I can escape the room without being detected, I can usually count on a good little nap from him, especially in the afternoon. If not, then we are back to square one.

Heaven help me when he is older and can't be left on my bed anymore, since I'm pretty sure my days of climbing in a crib are long gone.


  1. Oh, good for you. I'm terribly jealous. My little guy prefers sleeping on someone. If you put him down by himself he quickly awakens, mightily offended, and cries like someone has pinched him. Sometimes he will give you a few minutes to get your hopes up, just long enough to maybe empty some of the dishwasher or sort out a few clothes, but he never fails to wake up and complain.

  2. Anonymous4:49 PM

    Whatever it takes, sweetie. Whatever it takes.

    I remember having to lay my arm against Princess as she fell asleep in her crib or the bassinet. After I thought she was really asleep, and not in the fake out stage I'd s-l-o-w-l-y pull my arm out. Then I'd dive for the floor and crawl out of her room because if her eyes opened the tiniest bit and she caught the slightest movement it was all over.

    It gets better. I just don't remember when because I have successfully implemented the selective memory method. ;)

  3. I'm so glad you figured out a system that works. But you know the frustrating thing? Usually daddies can get baby to sleep without all these shenanigans. What's up with that? And why don't they put babies to sleep more often if they're so skilled?

    Wow. I didn't realize I had all that bottled up. I feel better now.

  4. Anonymous8:33 AM

    I am right there with you. I have a 3 month old who loves to sleep...if you are holding him and cuddling him. Put him down and all bets are off. I have three other children as well and homeschool and I just cannot seem to get anything done! When I get frustrated, I try to remember this is only temporary. Getting up every 2-3 hours at night (still!) is only temporary. Right? Please tell me it is only temporary? :)

  5. I used the crawling out of the room method all of the time - especially at night - remember to watch out for any errent squeaks in the floor. I finally figured out if I removed the vibrator from the bouncy chair and let it vibrate next to her for hours - she would sleep better. We went through A LOT of batteries but at least I got a few minutes to take a shower.
    I hope the method continues to work for you!!

  6. I recognize those moves! I expect to perfect them again right soon.

    I hope Bun keeps up the sleeping and you out of the crib. (I can just imagine!)

  7. My older son had colic. If and when he would fall asleep in the family room (in the swing his favorite and only sleeping place), we would crawl out. If we stood up it was like he could sense us and he'd wake up crying.
    My youngest would only fall asleep to Fox News (I think he's going to be a conservative). We'd feed him during O'Reilly and he be asleep by the end of Hannity and Combs.
    You do what you have to :)


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