Sunday, October 22, 2006

Holding Down the Fort

Blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh . . . .
I know you can't see me (can you?) but I have finally collapsed in the computer chair and I am slouching horribly (don't cringe, Mom) and my head is hanging over the back of the chair and I am wishing that a big bowl of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream would appear before me . . . that, or a margarita . . . it's all good . . .

Today is Day 4 of Rob's Moldovan Odyssey and I am feeling the strain of the weekend. I know I haven't mentioned it here before, but my darling helpmate is on a medical mission trip to the Republic of Moldova, teaching Advanced Life Support in Obstetrics (ALSO) to Moldovan physicians. For those of you (like me) who may think that Moldova sounds like Rob made it up and really went to Vegas, I assure you it is a real place. It is a small country in eastern Europe, tucked snugly between Romania and the Ukraine. It is the poorest country in eastern Europe, but apparently has one kickin' wine business going. That, and two McDonald's, according to Rob. He is able to send us fairly regular emails, and today he visited an ancient monastery that was once a Museum of Atheism during Moldova's Soviet days. (My question: what is displayed in a museum of atheism, I wonder?) Tomorrow starts the real teaching work, and then he comes home next Sunday, after a nice stop in Vienna, expressly for sightseeing and the purchase of shiny trinkets for one's wife and children back home.
He really sounds like he is having a wonderful experience, and I am glad that this opportunity came along for him . . . (here it comes people, hold on, get ready for it)

BUT . . . .

Holy Mother of God, please don't let me lose my mind with these children! I don't know what was going on here to day, but the kids and I have been like oil and water from the get-go. Even my Baby Girl, my go-to girl for the big smile and the squishy snuggle, was not feelin' it today.
I don't even think I can recount all of the minutiae that seemed to send each of us over the edge today, nor would you want me to because you've all been there. You know those days when things just don't gel and you need a do-over.

But I know that this, too, shall pass, because this is not the first time Rob and I have been separated. He spent most of 2005 away from us when he was called up with the Navy Reserves, so we know how to lump it on our own. But that's kind of the problem, we are just lumping it. Rob's deployment gave me the confidence to know that I can take care of the kids and the house all on my own, but that it's really not much fun. We are meant to function as a team, and with Rob currently on the DL, that means that I am first, second, and third string. A zone defense
will only take me so far!

So if you happen to see my kids before next Sunday, and they look kind of like animals that have been released into the wild, you're not seeing things. They probably are looking a little ragged around the edges, but I'm ok that with right now. I don't have the energy not to be!

3 comments:

  1. I know it is hard to be home with the kids and dad nowhere in sight. Even knowing you have done it before and you can manage does not make some days easier.

    As a note of encouragement, know that you are doing a service too. By freely allowing your husband to take this time away from family to serve others you are serving Christ as well. Sometimes as moms we feel that our ability to serve is limmited to our family, and this is discouraging. But when we enourage and support our husbands in their service we share in the grace that result. So, good for you too in supporthing this ministry.

    Hope this week goes well. Sometimes the knowledge that you have to do it all yourself makes things seem worse than they are. We'll be praying for you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous1:13 PM

    Prayng for you Aim. The older kids are probably wigging out a bit b/c they remembe the deployment and the baby is wigging out because the older ones are wigging out. She knows somethig is off, she just can't figure out what it is.

    You are strong ! Keep,praying and offer it up for someone-maybe the people of Moldova.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Aunt Floss7:36 PM

    Believe it or not...someday the kids are gonna be old enough to chill on their own! Till then, go ahead and chill with a big bowl of cookie dough on your own! You deserve it!
    Love Aunt Floss

    ReplyDelete

Go ahead and say it. You know you want to.